thoughts on
Aug. 25th, 2013 05:01 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
okaeri1. Communication
I guess a lot of unnecessary thoughts from my end was addressed the moment I asked what can I realistically expect from you. I know, I know. I should have done this before but my pride was just too much. I keep on pushing an ideal when everyone knows that it'll break more than make.
2. Having not much to say
I'm really embarrassed. I realized how little is happening to my life outside our relationship, though that's a choice I made knowingly. Even with other people, I catch those moments when I run out of things to say about myself. And so I resolve to do something about it by working twice as hard for the things I've loved first.
3. How we fill up those spaces
The reason why I was willing to try this relationship thing with you is how we were friends first. And I'm glad I did take the risk? I enjoy the company but the way we desperately touch keeps the wait worth it. It's really embarrassing for me to admit but if I could have you touch me more times in a week, I'd be totally up for that. My blanket can only do so much.
4. Blow jobs
And so the deed has been done. With my limited knowledge of how to do it (again, thank you internet), I sure hope I did fine. According to porn and forum posts, I guess I did well to have had you come in a short while. You deserve it though? I can't be the only one losing her mind... But blow jobs are overrated, no? I'm not so sure I enjoyed myself but as long as you're good...
5. What comes next
To be quite honest, I panicked a little when you suggested we move to a motel instead. You quickly added a "chos" but we both know we wanted to, with the way we made out for hours. I'll just say though that I think I'm ready, just as long as we're protected. I don't think we're quite ready for that. But I'd very much like to do it with you?
I guess a lot of unnecessary thoughts from my end was addressed the moment I asked what can I realistically expect from you. I know, I know. I should have done this before but my pride was just too much. I keep on pushing an ideal when everyone knows that it'll break more than make.
2. Having not much to say
I'm really embarrassed. I realized how little is happening to my life outside our relationship, though that's a choice I made knowingly. Even with other people, I catch those moments when I run out of things to say about myself. And so I resolve to do something about it by working twice as hard for the things I've loved first.
3. How we fill up those spaces
The reason why I was willing to try this relationship thing with you is how we were friends first. And I'm glad I did take the risk? I enjoy the company but the way we desperately touch keeps the wait worth it. It's really embarrassing for me to admit but if I could have you touch me more times in a week, I'd be totally up for that. My blanket can only do so much.
4. Blow jobs
And so the deed has been done. With my limited knowledge of how to do it (again, thank you internet), I sure hope I did fine. According to porn and forum posts, I guess I did well to have had you come in a short while. You deserve it though? I can't be the only one losing her mind... But blow jobs are overrated, no? I'm not so sure I enjoyed myself but as long as you're good...
5. What comes next
To be quite honest, I panicked a little when you suggested we move to a motel instead. You quickly added a "chos" but we both know we wanted to, with the way we made out for hours. I'll just say though that I think I'm ready, just as long as we're protected. I don't think we're quite ready for that. But I'd very much like to do it with you?
